Estate Planning Conversations Around the Holiday Table

As the holidays approach, families gather to share meals, stories, and traditions. These moments, rich with emotion and connection, offer an ideal opportunity to also discuss the future, particularly estate planning. While it might feel uncomfortable, addressing these topics provides peace of mind for everyone involved.

Starting the Conversation

Nearly 55% of U.S. adults don’t have a will or estate plan. Without clear plans, probate can consume 3–7% of an estate’s value, creating financial and emotional strain. Starting these conversations during quiet moments, perhaps during a walk rather than over the main meal, can ease the tension.

Questions Adult Children Can Ask Their Parents

• Do you have an up-to-date will or trust in place?
• Who have you chosen to make financial and medical decisions if you're unable to?
• Have you shared your wishes for medical care and end-of-life planning?
• If something happened tomorrow, would we know where to find your important documents and accounts?
• Are there heirlooms or traditions you’d like us to know the stories behind?
• Do you feel confident that the people you’ve chosen to handle your affairs are still the right ones?

These questions ensure clarity and prevent confusion, helping to honor wishes and avoid surprises later.

Questions Parents Can Ask Their Adult Children

• Do you know where to find my important documents in case of an emergency?
• Have you considered creating your own will or an estate plan?
• If you received an inheritance tomorrow, would you know what to do with it— or who to turn to for help?
• Are there family keepsakes or traditions you’d be heartbroken not to have carried forward?
• If you had to step in to help us — financially or medically — what support would you need?

For parents, asking adult children about their plans can encourage foresight and ensure that family legacies continue.

Benefits of Estate Planning

Estate planning is not just for the wealthy. It's about control, clarity, care, efficiency, and legacy. It helps decide who will handle your estate, ensures loved ones know your wishes, protects dependents, cuts probate costs, and passes down values and stories.

Empowering Families

Framing estate planning as a gift simplifies the conversation: it's about caring for those you love and alleviating future burdens. If you feel unsure about where to start, reach out to a trusted advisor for guidance. Having these conversations now can prevent confusion, legal disputes, and emotional pain down the road.